Before I Fall
by beyondmythought-s
Summary: "Here's another thing to remember: hope keeps you alive. Even when you're dead, it's the only thing that keeps you alive." Beth felt the hope ignite in her chest, the hope that allowed her to reopen her eyes and see the world again. Post Coda, Bethyl. Based off of a series of quotes from Lauren Oliver's Before I Fall
1. Chapter 1

_**"Here's another thing to remember: hope keeps you alive. Even when you're dead, it's the only thing that keeps you alive"**_

Beth couldn't recall much after shoving the scissors in Dawn's collarbone. Though, she knew for sure when she regained consciousness was that she was not wearing such a beautiful dress. Beth fingered the material. The satin material was much softer than anything she had donned on since the turn. It just wasn't plausible or reasonable when sooner or later in this new world you had to run.

Beth spun around and let the dress swirl around, it felt like when she was little and she wore her Sunday sundresses for church before her mama served lemonade and lunch when Maggie and she had free time. They would dance in the fields of wildflowers growing in abundance.

As Beth spun she caught sight of the farmhouse that she had grown up in. It looked nothing like the fiery hell that they had left behind when the home it was overrun. Now the home had an ethereal light coming from it. She felt a crawling sensation similar to when she was tracking with Daryl. She had ignored that sensation and had stepped into an old animal trap.

She turned to see what caused the tingling sensation in her spine. Behind her it looked like an ominous dark fog was heading towards her. She knew that whatever was in that fog was dangerous. Her senses wouldn't be sending warning bells if it was safe.

And like always, she did what she knew best. She ran to the home, ran up directly up the stairs leading to the porch, and she began banging on the front door. If she had been thinking clearly she would have burst through the front door of her childhood home.

Imagine her shock when the door swung open and she was face to face with Merle Dixon. He should have intimidated her, but spending so much time with Daryl had given her insight on how to deal with a Dixon. Besides standing directly behind him with a Sunday brunch prepared was her family. Her father looking lovingly over her mama and brother.

Beth felt more trepidation walking into the home than she felt when running from the fog. Growing up, her daddy always had such a strict vision of what heaven would look like. He had described it as giant pearl gates that enclosed a beautiful city paved with mansions and lined with gold streets that lead to the one true king. Though, when her father was out of ear shot her mama would whisper her version of heaven to Beth like she was sharing some obscene conspiracy. Her mama said that heaven wasn't a fancy place, but a place you felt most at peace. That God's final gift was to let you spend eternity with people who were like family in a comforting place for eternity.

She guessed in this moment her Mama's intuition had been correct.

"Yer here too early kid" Merle told her. For a moment his tone almost sounded like she crashed a party. She didn't quite know how to respond.

"Oh hush now, stop being a fuddy duddy. She can still go back, she ain't permeant yet" Annette chided Merle.

Beth could see Shawn and her daddy fighting their snickers as her petite mama took on ole Merle Dixon who was at least a foot taller than her.

"It does matter when it's my baby brother who's hurtin' while she's here socializing with us. It ain't heathy for her neither" Merle argued back.

Any other time Beth would of forewarned Merle the mistake of trying to take on a determined Annette. The day she broke up the fight with a gun shot at the prison she had been channeling her mama. But as is, Beth was hardly following the situation at hand. All she knew was that she was surrounded in her old home with people she knew to be dead.

"Am I dead? What's going on?" Beth interrupted the silent war occurring between her Mama and Merle. She figured it was alright because her questions needed to be answered to help clear the fog in her brain.

Her daddy stepped up for that question, "That's for you to decide, doodlebug."

Beth wasn't sure what to make of her daddy's cryptic words. "For me to decide? What does that even mean?" Beth knew she wasn't stupid. She was just struggling to piece the puzzle pieces together to get the full picture.

"What it means, doodlebug, is if you wanna be dead we can take you to your final resting place and if you wanna live well you can choose that too. You've got time" her daddy's tone was reassuring and kind. She recognized that tone. He used it on her and her siblings on multiple occasions. It's when they had choices, but he already made up his mind and he waited for his children to make the right choice.

Although, unlike when she was a child this decision had serious consequences.

"She don't got time to be wasting she needs to choose now. Lil' brotha…" Merle was cut off by an angered Annette.

"This is her decision, not yours. She can sit down for a meal and work out what she wants. I get you're looking out for your brother, but this isn't his decision." Annette gave her sternest look to Merle. Beth gave him credit he hardly looked cowed by her.

"It ain't my decision, but it don' sit right with me us having lunch whiles lil' brotha is prolly suffering thinking she's dead" Merle was equally if not more stubborn on the issue of his little brother as her mom was adamant about this being Beth's choice.

Both were at an impasse in their fight locked into a heated glaring session. Shawn who hadn't spoken at all since Beth had arrived in the home spoke up.

"Well, while y'all look at each other, I ain't gonna waste Mama and Patricia's cookin'" and he promptly sat down at the set dining room table and began feasting.

Beth sat down next to Shawn and grabbed the basket of rolls. Everyone seemed to follow suit and promptly ignored Merle and Annette's argument in favor of eating and catching Beth up on what heaven was really like.

The meal was heartwarming as she discovered that Otis and Patricia opted to stay behind in case Beth had chosen to crossover to prepare a bedroom for her. She had also learned that Jimmy and Zach sent their best wishes but had chosen to remain among their families on the other side. Only a limited few were allowed to gather in the halfway house to help Beth truly decide her fate.

The dinner was filled with laughter and joy. Beth hadn't felt this at ease in forever. The last time she could recall feeling anything similar was in that funeral home when Daryl had scooped her up and served her pig's feet for breakfast. Although, that meal hadn't been quite as grand as the meal laid out before her the company had been what caused that sense of contentment.

Thinking of Daryl made Beth feel weird sensations in her chest. It was almost like a pulling, like the thought of him anchored her somewhere else. The pulling became a little too much for Beth and she stood and excused herself to stand on the porch of her home.

The pulling her chest was making it difficult to breathe. She grasped the porch to help center herself and steady her breathing. She looked up and she could see in the horizon a fire burning and heading in this direction. Beth felt the shriek leave her mouth before she could gather what exactly was happening.

Merle and her mama burst onto the porch.

"She's gonna have to choose now Annette. We shouldn't of wasted time breakin' bread" Merle shouted.

Annette looked forlorn. "Oh, Bethy. You gotta choose. You wanna come with us or you wanna go back?"

Beth felt her heart doubling its rate. She was never good in these scenarios. She never chose well.

"I don't know what to choose Mama" Beth was frantic. The pulling was getting stronger in her chest.

She considered for a moment that this is what a heart attack felt like, but that wouldn't make sense if she was technically already dead.

"Bethy, baby girl. It looks like you've already chosen. Just know we'll be looking after you always." Her mama's smile was serene.

Merle smiled, "You look after my baby brother, he's gonna need you"

Beth couldn't really put the pieces together of what they were saying. The pulling was getting stronger and it made it difficult to focus on any of their words. The pulling became so strong and Beth's vision went black.

Beth blinked a few times as she felt her body waking on its own accord.

"Girl, girl you alive?" an African American male wearing a weird suit type thing was leaning over her body.

"My, my name is Beth Greene" Beth mumbled.

"I'm Morgan, Morgan Jones. You had a nasty head wound but I took care of it for you." He told her kindly.

She was alive. It made sense what Merle and her Mama had been telling her. She smiled. They gave her hope when she was dead, that hope she would carry until she could share it with her family.

* * *

Feeling inspired, I recently reread Before I Fall by Lauren Oliver and I was inspired by so many quotes. You'll see the quotes bolded in this story. I hope y'all enjoy this little adventure.

A huge thank you to my loving ladies Ashley (Akiraflame), Jazzy (Jazznsmoke), and Kels (coolstoryshawty). You three are literal angels and nothing would of been written without your love and support. Mwah.

As always, the standard disclaimer applies. I don't own TWD or any of it's characters.


	2. Chapter 2

_**"I shiver, thinking how easy it is to be totally wrong about people to see one tiny part of them and confuse it for the whole, to see the cause and think it's the effect or vice versa."**_

Beth felt her eyes opening. The situation put her on edge, she didn't know where she was. The last she remembered was Dawn and a loud popping noise. She assumed with the eerie visit to her old farm home, that popping noise was a bullet that hit her. She just wasn't quite sure. She tried to sit up quickly to gather her surroundings.

"Don't move too quickly, you have a nasty head wound. I cleaned it best I could. You remember your name?" A man wearing an old military jacket and tired looking eyes asked her.

Beth briefly wondered if she would be in a similar situation as Grady. She felt guarded and unsure.

"My name is Beth, Beth Greene. Why are you helping me?" Beth needed that question answered. The answer would let her know if he was a good person or not.

"I'm trying to catch up with an old friend. He was leaving me signs. I saw you near his hat" The man gestured to Rick's sheriff hat, "Looks like you were in a shallow grave and had clawed your way out. I knew I had to help. Redeem myself" The man told her gruffly.

"Redeem yourself?" Beth felt her breath hitching. She didn't want to be stuck with some man with a fucked up sense of right and wrong trying to redeem himself.

"I failed my family, they were innocents. Rick is like family, if I can help save his family maybe when I finally go I'll be with my family" The man told her honestly. He got up and began fiddling with various items among the room.

Beth could read people really well by now. Despite the head injury she felt confident in the man's words. Sure, he might have been a little weird. Watching as he flittered about the room playing with intricate traps she realized his level of genius. He might have been quirky but the way this man built things was unreal. Beth realized she had been observing him without asking him his name.

"What is your name?" Beth was interested. Maybe Rick had mentioned this man before, and that would add another piece of trust to be awarded to this strange man.

"Morgan Jones" he told her with a small smile.

Beth racked her brain with that name. The only snippet of conversation she could remember was Rick saying something to her daddy, but she wasn't quite sure. The memory was fuzzy.

"Here is some water" Morgan threw a water bottle at her. "This'll help you build up strength. We gotta leave soon if we wanna catch Rick and his group"

"How did you know what to do for me? I mean if I was so injured that my family assumed I was dead…?" Beth trailed off and let the question hang in the air.

"Before the turn, I was a trauma nurse for the army. I had recently retired and had begun a residency with a neurological team. The combination of both helped with that nasty head wound." Morgan told her.

"How long have you been treating me?" Beth felt dread at that answer.

"Close to two weeks, which is why we need to leave soon to catch up with Rick. I had to flush the wound and bandage what I could. Plus, waking from a coma is always tricky. It took you a week to stay awake, you've been conscious in spurts" Morgan informed her before hunkering down at a desk in the corner of the room.

Beth sipped on the water bottle. She felt better that Morgan was talking about catching up with Rick. She figured they must've assumed she was dead to have left her partially buried. She wondered briefly if Maggie was with them and the kind of grief she must have been going through. She couldn't imagine the grief Daryl was going through.

It must have been something fierce with the way Merle had reacted at the farm home. Beth felt a pang in her heart. Morgan was right, they needed to travel soon so they could catch up to them. She wanted to show Daryl that he might be the last man standing, but that she would be damned if it wasn't for a very long time. She needed to prove that she wasn't some dead girl, but that she was a survivor.

Beth moved her feet off of the bed and onto the floor. She wanted to test her strength. This would give her a good idea if she were able to travel or not. Standing straight up she had a dizzy spell slam. She closed her eyes tight and let the dizziness wash away.

She could feel Morgan's eyes on her. Tracking her movements around the room. After the initial dizzy spell she felt well enough to walk. She looked at a nearby map. She could see Rick's messy scrawl and a red line leading to Richmond.

"He left that for me in case I get too far behind I guess" Morgan told her.

She was thankful that her quiet companion was at least willing to communicate with her. She nodded her head to let him know she was listening and understood. She walked the perimeter of the room, stopping at the bookcase. Looking at a few of the titles, seeing if any were worth taking on the road. She had seen a farmer's almanac that was worth taking. Those books were always filled with useful information.

Morgan from the desk had opened a music box, probably to get the screws out of it. The lullaby was familiar. She remembered her Mama singing it with her.

Beth hummed the lullaby the words slipping through her lips before she could reel them back in.

_Somewhere over the rainbow way up high  
There's a land that I heard of once in a lullaby  
Somewhere over the rainbow skies are blue  
And the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true_

The words caught in her throat. She remembered telling the doctor at Grady that she still sang, but she wished she could be singing for her family. Not that her present company was unpleasant, he could be much worse.

"You've got a beautiful voice, you didn't have to stop" Morgan told her kindly.

Beth felt her mind swirling to the funeral home. She remembered Daryl's gruff words telling her to keep singing. The little bit had lit a fire inside of Beth's belly. She knew deep in her gut come hell or high water she would rejoin her family. She would show Daryl and her family that she was tough, that she was a survivor as well.

"More importantly, I think we should reunite that voice with your family. You feel comfortable with travel at sunrise?" Morgan asked her.

"Whatever it takes to get to them, I'll be ready for" Beth said confidently.

Beth almost laughed at the absurdity of the team she and Morgan made. The song bird and the crazed inventor. Those titles meant nothing Beth realized. Those titles didn't define either of them.

She was thankful to see Morgan as a whole instead of just his fractured pieces. The same way she was thankful he viewed her the same way.

She was happy to know that beginning tomorrow she would be a few steps closer to seeing her family once again.

* * *

A/N: So, we have Morgan and Beth getting ready to hit the road.

Though, I do have a favor to ask of my readers/friends. My close friend jazznsmoke is taking a step back from beta'ing to concentrate on some other things. I'm really excited for any project she takes on and I send my love her way. But I am prone to mistakes and will be in desperate need of a beta. So, if any of you are interested please let me know!

As always, let me know what you think of the newest chapter.

Disclaimer: I don't own TWD or any of its characters


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